Why The O.C.?
"Why the heck not? I will never forget sitting down that late August evening and watching the pilot with my dad. He thought it was crap. I thought it was brilliant. There was something about it – despite its ridiculousness – that I could relate to. I wanted to become a part of it. Luckily, by some stroke of luck even Josh Schwartz couldn’t have envisioned, I got hired."
— Mike Metz (Writers' Production Assistant)

And now the top 10 moments in the history of the show.*
(* Disclaimer: these are my favorite 10 moments, and in no way represent the top 10 most important moments or anything like that, so freaking get over it. Thank you.)

10. Caleb Takes the Plunge
Poor ol’ Caleb. Rich beyond belief. Created a hot daughter. Dated a hot mom. Ran Newport like Mussolini. Julie Cooper tries to kill him, changes her mind, but too late; he still croaks. It’s not that he didn’t deserve it or anything: when you treat the main character of a primetime soap (Ryan) poorly, eventually you are going to die in a totally unconnected fashion. It’s about as much a given as the scantily dressed cheerleader in a horror film. Poor ol’ Caleb, rest in peace.

9. Shot to the Heart
While it is hard to overlook the pure sexiness of Marissa firing off a gun, this truly stands as an iconic scene in television history. Rarely do femme fatales, at least on primetime, go to such extremes for their dude. Marissa does just that. She shoots Trey to save Ryan. This is one of the best season-ending cliffhangers on any show in recent memory -- I spent the whole summer trying to decide whether or not I wanted Trey dead. I mean, does that make me a bad person? He did rape Marissa. But, he’s Ryan brother. Hmmm. Kill the bastard.

8. Upside Down and Inside Out
When viewing the Spider-Man Kiss for the first time, I really did not enjoy it. Honestly, I told almost everyone I knew how cheesy I thought it was. How stupid. How lame. How uncreative. Two or so years later, I realize it is the scene I talk about most. I never stop talking about it. Or stop fantasizing about a similarly constructed lip lock with a striking young brunette in my future. Of course, I’ll be creative and do something out of Superman, but that’s beside the point.

7. Welcome to the __, _____!
It is somewhat unfortunate Luke’s character will forever be associated with uttering the most important words in the history of The O.C. Nonetheless, “Welcome to the O.C., bitch!” goes down as the 2000’s version of “Bada bing.” And it’s a hell of a lot better than “You’re going to Hollywood!” or “Deal or No Deal.” At least this is reality. Bitch.

6. The Ironist to the Rescue and a Mall Slumber Party (it’s a tie)
Probably my favorite moments of the fourth season came in last week’s episode as Seth does anything he can to get Ryan to the hospital. The conversation, the facial exchanges, the antics – all classic Atwood-Cohenisms. About as classic as the Mallpisode of season two. Like the mall slumber fiestas of teen shows of lore (think Saved by the Bell), the fearsome foursome ran amuck. You know what would be perfect? Ryan with a shard of glass stuck in his side as they venture around the mall.

5. The Bikini Goes Bonkers
Marissa obviously had things on her mind when Julie approaches her poolside. Putting it lightly, Marissa freaks out: screaming and flipping her lawn chair into the aquatic basin. Based on these actions, I would have never guessed this was a young lady with a drinking problem. Not in a million years.

4. The Yacht Moon Shot
The second Summer realizes she has feelings for Seth, across the country, young scrawny Jewish boys like myself knew there was a chance. Sarcasm, obscure pop culture references and emo pop on the iPod all of sudden meant a shot at an attractive girl. All secured by a kiss at the back of the boat. Not since the “Chanukah Song” had it been so cool to be Jewish. Ahh, those were the days.

3. Hey
With the simple exchange of this three-letter word, we knew there was something between Ryan and Marissa. According to Wikipedia, “hey” means: “an interjection used to draw attention, commonly used as a salutation or greeting among familiars in English-speaking countries.” My definition: “an exchange between a Russell Crowe- look-alike and a troubled Princess, which draws attention amongst familiars in the greatest freaking county in the freaking state of California, while simultaneously starting a Revolution.”

2. A Day for All of His People
In the words of George’s Dad, Chrismukkah is a “festivus for the rest of us.” Personally attracted to the succulent nectars of both Christmas (stockings) and Chanukkah (eight nights of presents), a stream of joy entered my being when I discovered I could truly celebrate both holidays. With the invention of this glorious holiday, I now feel like I am somebody. Something. It’s a Chrismukkah Miracle. That it is indeed.

1a. You Knew It Was Coming
In a scene I’m sure both Ryan and Taylor will never forget, a special someone portrayed a French Production Assistant. I’m sure this episode, the 10th of the fourth season, will garner Emmy mentions. I’m sure. But that’s not really what it is all about. I was just doing my job, showing Ryan to the producer. And then totally gawking Taylor until I was kindly escorted from the stage.

1. Newport’s Man of the Past Four Years
Imagine one of those college comedy studying montages. You know what I’m talking about: when the main character is about to be kicked out of college unless he passes some impossible test. Usually accompanied by upbeat alternative rock music. The character falls asleep at some point due to all the hard work. You get the point. That’s what I went through to try to decide on my number one OC moment. In the end – oddly similar to most of the college studying montages – I came up with an answer outside the text book. My number one moment is not a moment at all. It is a person. A man. Sandy Cohen. The father we all wished we had, Sandy is our generation’s Archie Bunker. Except we actually like him. So my number one moment? Sandy Cohen, you dog, you.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone who read this column weekly. There is nothing I enjoy more than blogging about my favorite show and your support has made this beyond rewarding. As the final episode airs, I once again return to my old college tradition of O.E. for the O.C. With this in mind, I raise my Olde English forty to all. Adios O.C., bitch.